Birthday Thoughts

A lot of people look forward to their birthdays because it’s that one day that you get to feel special. You receive presents. People are nice to you. And suddenly, everybody is your friend. I don’t fancy it that much and I dread it a bit. For one, if you’re in the Philippines, you have to treat your friends and family for dinner or something which sort of contradicts that notion that it’s supposed to be your special day in which case they should be the ones treating you. I also don’t like attracting too much attention. In the workplace, I would hope nobody knows about it. I should just take a leave of absence next time. AND for every “Happy Birthday!” greeting you receive, it’s like a taunt echoing at the back of your head saying, “You’re getting older!” Doesn’t bother me, really. Well, maybe just a little. It’s amusing how when we’re younger, we couldn’t wait to get older and now, all we want is for time to stop.

It does feel good when people show their love through messages of affirmation. And Facebook makes this so much easier. I received hundreds of FB notifications, genuine and generic ones. I’m also guilty of this obligatory greeting as FB claims we’re friends. I suppose it’s an attempt of maintaining a connection. We are very much connected, social media-wise but are so personally disconnected. It’s a shame when friendships are reduced to yearly birthday greetings until we stop communicating at all.

I realized my love language is quality time. According to Chapman, there are five types – words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch. So more than the kind words and deeds, the presents, the hug, just the time spent with me is enough to let me know that I’m loved.

I am in my early 30s and I feel like I’m settled at this point. Not in the material or achievement kind of way, but you know, as a person. I have a good understanding of who I am, what works for me, what I want in life. I’m more self-aware and I think I’m living a balanced life. But of course, there are still a lot of things to learn and experience, places to visit, and people to meet.

Nowadays, you see all these under 30 overachievers who already built a business empire, are famous, or are super successful. And you ask yourself, “What have I been doing with my life?” I guess celebrating one’s birthday is not so bad after all because it basically is a celebration of life. It’s the best time to look back and reflect on both the good and the bad things that happened to you.

I’ve been keeping a journal for a while now and as a response to the “100 Happy Days Challenge” I started writing things that made me happy in a day no matter how mundane they may seem. I continue doing this up to this time because it’s a great way of reminding me to be more mindful and be appreciative of everything.

So cheers to life and here’s to more birthdays to come!

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Author: Ryan Bestre

Environmentalist. Teacher. Writer.

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